Friday, April 17, 2009

It's your turn to clean up the vomit, honey!

Ahhhhh, the joys of parenthood. Hugs, kisses, cute little drawings hanging on the refrigerator, tickle fights, snuggles, chalk art on the sidewalk......Makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, doesn't it? And then there's the other stuff. I'm talking specifically about boogers here. Boogers and other bodily fluids. Nobody warns you about the seemingly unlimited quantities and varieties of nasty goop that come out of small children. From all bodily orifices and usually showing up at the most inconvenient time and place (like dripping over the shoulder of your favorite black blouse that you JUST took out of the dryer and put on for work). The sheer quantity of the stuff constantly amazes me. How is it even physically possible for that much mucous/vomit/diarrhea/pick-your-bodily-fluid to come out of one little boy? And, why oh why, am I writing about such a disgusting topic, anyway? Because that's my life. And because today was one of those exceedingly rare occasions when it wasn't MY job to clean it up. Heh, heh. I had a work meeting that just couldn't be postponed this morning, so my darling husband, love of my life, had to stay home to take care of the sickies. Now, in defense of my own mothering instinct (and to make sure that nobody thinks I am a heartless wench for being callous about my husband having to deal with the fluid issue), I was the sole caregiver for the last two full days of runny noses, hacking coughs, high fevers, diarrhea, and the really, really bad behavior that accompanies two little guys who both feel genuinely crummy and are competing for every second of Mommy's time and attention. So, I have good reason to get a little chuckle out of it being somebody else's turn for a change. And, as I walked out the front door (running late, as usual), hearing my littlest boy starting to make that retching sound that comes right before an explosion of vomit, I cheerily called out, "Honey, the oxy-clean is on the shelf above the washing machine. Love you!" And, I am slightly ashamed to admit, it kind've brightened my day.

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