Friday, January 20, 2012

McDonalds Rescue Heroes!!!

First of all, I have to admit that the boys and I spend a lot of time at McDonalds. A lot. Before you judge, keep in mind that I've been primarily single-parenting my two little guys for the past 3 1/2 years, given hubby's work schedule. Every weekend. By myself. In an area of the country where it rains pretty much all the time. With two little boys, who are only 1 year and 2 1/2 weeks apart and no involved family anywhere nearby to give me a break. Ever. OK, I'm done justifying, because here's the thing about McDonalds restaurants...

They have TUBES! Bright-colored, loopy tubes and slides and climby-ramps. Bouncy tunnels and little rooms with soft mats where kids can wrestle and jump around. See-through bubble compartments that look like spaceships with steering wheels.

In other words, McD's provides a space where two little boys can completely exhaust themselves, while their always-exhausted mother can drink coffee and restore her sanity.

Yes, they're disgustingly dirty. I've seen the T.V. shows. And, there are far too few parents who enforce the sock rule, which sometimes makes me gag a little bit. But, I pack around the hand sanitizer, insist that we always take a bath or shower on the days we hit a McD's, and cross my fingers. Besides, isn't exposure to germs supposed to help kids build up their immune systems? I read that somewhere, and I'm going with that one.

So, my little guys have been coming to McDonalds since the first one started walking. At the ripe old age of 9 months. Sigh. We even have nicknames for the different McD's around town. There's "The Wet McDonalds", because the roof used to leak when it rained. Then, there's "The Mall McDonalds", which has the coolest rope net to climb on, but is usually way too busy to provide any sort of Mommy recovery time. This brings us to "The Ferndale McDonalds", which is just up the highway a bit, and has the best ramp tower. Finally, The Dirty McDonalds", because once we went there, and every single table was dirty. I swore I'd never go back, but the boys talked me into it, and everything was clean that time. Must've been under new management. Plus, it has the coolest tubes, bar none. I know how cool they are, because I once had to climb up in there to save my 3-year-old, who had gotten lost and stuck and was crying to be rescued.

Which brings me to the "Rescue Heroes" topic. Finally. Any parent, who has spent as much time as I have at McDonalds, has probably had to climb up the tubes to rescue her child at one time or another. I have had to perform 3 rescues over the years. The afore-mentioned one, which occurred at "The Dirty McDonalds", as well as 2 rescues at "The Mall McDonalds." Which is why, until my boys reached the ages at which they would no longer need rescuing, I always wore comfortable clothes for our McD's visits.

Today at McDonalds, it all came full circle. My boys were playing like maniacs, as usual, when I heard a pathetic little voice calling out, "Mama? Mama? Can't find you, Mama!" I looked up and saw a cute little boy, about 3 years old, waaaaay up on one of the ramps, tears streaming down his cheeks. About a minute later, a harried-looking Mom showed up, looking up anxiously and calling to her little boy, "Come on down, honey. Can't you come down?" "I can't, Mama. I lost up here." (By the way, this Mom must've been a McD's newbie, because she was NOT wearing comfortable clothes. Not even close. There was no way she was going to be climbing up those tubes in her cute little skirt. No way.)

At that, I hollered for Spencer and Foster and told the worried Mom that my boys would climb up and help her little guy find his way back down. (I actually had no idea if they'd do it or not, at least not without some complaining about it first, but I hoped they'd grab onto the opportunity to do something heroic. Fingers crossed.) As it turned out, they were incredibly excited to help out the little guy. My heart was bursting with pride as they grinned at me and said, "Sure, Mom. We'll get him down!" and streaked up the tubes to the rescue. They were awesome. They led him through the tubes, helping him climb up the ramps by pulling on one end and pushing on the other, and they even slid down the slide with him, saying encouraging things all along the way. I'd like to say that the grateful Mom squatted down to thank my boys for their kindness, but she just stalked away with her kid. Sigh. It didn't seem to faze either of my boys, though. They were so proud and excited, in fact, that they led a second little lost kid out of the maze of tubes about 30 minutes later. And, that little boy's worried grandparents thanked them effusively. I just beamed.

My boys. Rescue heroes, indeed!



  1. Are you serious that the mom didn't thank them? That's disgusting!

    So are those tubes. Had my daughter ever needed me to come rescue her from a McDonald's tube, well, I would have just forwarded her mail :)

  2. By the way, Beth, that comment was me!

    1. Noelle,
      Hi there. So you're "Helping Joy"? I'll check it out this weekend, if I can ever catch my breath for a few minutes. Cheers!

  3. Bwaa haa haa. I love the forwarding her mail comment. Thanks for the giggle.

  4. Actually, no new blog! I was just helping my Aunt Joy start a blog but I couldn't do it by memory so I had to sign in for a new one to follow along with her! I forgot to sign out and delete it before I commented here! lol

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