Thursday, October 8, 2009

Nobody wants to go on a playdate looking like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer!

OK, first things first. Playdating is just as nerve-wracking as real dating used to be when I was single. I know that I need to put myself out there to meet the other Kindergarten parents. Spence is making friends and wants to get to know them better, so I've got to bite the bullet, right? So, I bravely emailed a few of the other parents from his Kindergarten class, and the playdating dance has begun. In fact, my first new playdate was supposed to happen today. We set it up two days ago, and I actually found myself worrying about what I was going to wear today. Seriously. Like it matters if I show up in sweatpants, work clothes, or "Mommy Jeans." But, I've actually been having thoughts like, "What if they don't like me?" "What if they live in a mansion and then come over to our teeny little house and think we're not worthy?" "What if the other Moms are all skinny and have perfect make-up and do Pilates?" "What if I don't fit in?" Notice that these questions are all about me and my insecurities? I have total faith in Spencer. He's a lovable, friendly kid. No worries there. Nope, all my anxiety is about my own potential unworthiness. What if we have a first playdate and then they never call me again??? I am having serious flashbacks to adolescence here. Ahhh, the fear of rejection!

So, today was supposed to be the first one. The big day. Spence was excited. I was nervous and excited too. But, I woke up experiencing side effects from the cortisone shot I had on Monday afternoon. I made it through work, and then I got online at home to look up my symptoms. (Thank goodness for Web MD.) And, lucky me -- I have two of the most popular side effects. First, I have something known in the medical community as "cortisone flare." That's the intensely increased pain which some patients experience for 48-72 hours after their injection, before the promised relief begins. Yeah. So, it's actually worse than it was before I got the shot that's supposed to make me quit limping around in constant pain. Fun, fun, fun! Second, I am one of the roughly 15% of patients who also get "facial flushing" after receiving their shot. Now, that really doesn't sound so bad, right? You're picturing a nice blush spreading across my cheeks, leaving me glowy and dewy-loooking, perhaps? WRONG! It started this morning with bright (and I do mean bright) red spots on each cheek. And, my skin felt HOT! Then, as the morning wore on, my face got redder and redder and redder. My secretary actually looked up at me and said, "I can actually see your nose getting redder. Does it feel hot, too?" Yes, actually. Every part of my face is boiling hot. I look like a rock lobster... One of my students stopped by to see me and said, "Mrs. B! Dude! What's wrong with your face???" Then, when I met Spencer at his bus this afternoon, he said, "Mommy, you're all RED! You look funny." Thanks a lot, kid. Way to be supportive.

Needless to say, there is no way I'm going on my very first playdate with a new family looking like Rudolph-the-friggin-Red-Nosed-Reindeer and feeling like my face is about to melt right off of my head. Not. Gonna. Happen. So, I called and postponed it. The other Mom was lovely about it on the phone, so we'll try again next week. And, maybe I'll have time to lose a few pounds before our playdate... sigh. Cheers!


  1. ok - i too need to become more ingratiated with my son's classmates parents; because he has a summer bday and it is a b^tch to get people to come to it!

    thanks for visiting the crib and i don't know what smegma ? is but i think i can make a pretty accurate guess - hmmm

  2. I know all of the moms and you will fit in! Of course I am curious to know who the playdate was supposed to be with. I am sorry that your shot has made you feel rather uncomfortable. I can't wait to hear how the playdate goes next week. :)

  3. what a great story! (sorry to laugh at your pain, Beth!) I'm about to embark on the playdate dance as well...I've put it off as long as I can, we have to invite Ali over to play. Ali, who my 3 year old son has decided he is going to marry. When they're big enough.

    Oh, brother!

  4. A least Web MD came in good for something, it always tells me I'm going to die if I put in that I have a hangnail! That stinks about postponing the playdate, but I completely understand your nervousness. We are supposed to have a playdate next Saturday. Our first too. I think it will go well and the kids will have a blast, but like you I'm a little worried about meeting other moms. Being around toddlers all day doesn't do much for your social skills, as you know.

  5. Back again to let you know you have an award waiting for you on my blog. Congrats!

  6. Oh, ladies, thanks for checking in and for all your support. I love my online "peeps". Good luck with all of your playdates too...Cheers!

  7. OMG! I think we must be soul sisters! How crazy is that! Tater Tot Mom and Chicken Nugget Mama....insane!

    I have the same insecurities about playdates. I tried to join a mom group a couple of years ago and all the mom's had these huge houses and lots of money and I felt so out of place...especially when I realized that hosting an event at my itty bitty house was going to be out of the question.

    I am always checking out WebMD and by my count now I have 13 diseases (just kidding!).

    Love your blog and I'm a follower now! Thanks for stopping by my blog!

  8. I usually try to put my best foot foward when getting ready for a first playdate. Eventually, after trying on several outfits, I go limp and decide to just go as little ol' me. I short out and have thoughts like...well she might as well see me with snot on my shirt because that's what I look like 90% of the time. Then, most of the time, I show up and the other mama is covered in snot too.

    The cool moms always are!


    PS I hope that you are less red and puffy today.