Nobody wants to go on a playdate looking like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer!

OK, first things first. Playdating is just as nerve-wracking as real dating used to be when I was single. I know that I need to put myself out there to meet the other Kindergarten parents. Spence is making friends and wants to get to know them better, so I've got to bite the bullet, right? So, I bravely emailed a few of the other parents from his Kindergarten class, and the playdating dance has begun. In fact, my first new playdate was supposed to happen today. We set it up two days ago, and I actually found myself worrying about what I was going to wear today. Seriously. Like it matters if I show up in sweatpants, work clothes, or "Mommy Jeans." But, I've actually been having thoughts like, "What if they don't like me?" "What if they live in a mansion and then come over to our teeny little house and think we're not worthy?" "What if the other Moms are all skinny and have perfect make-up and do Pilates?" "What if I don't fit in?" Notice that these questions are all about me and my insecurities? I have total faith in Spencer. He's a lovable, friendly kid. No worries there. Nope, all my anxiety is about my own potential unworthiness. What if we have a first playdate and then they never call me again??? I am having serious flashbacks to adolescence here. Ahhh, the fear of rejection!

So, today was supposed to be the first one. The big day. Spence was excited. I was nervous and excited too. But, I woke up experiencing side effects from the cortisone shot I had on Monday afternoon. I made it through work, and then I got online at home to look up my symptoms. (Thank goodness for Web MD.) And, lucky me -- I have two of the most popular side effects. First, I have something known in the medical community as "cortisone flare." That's the intensely increased pain which some patients experience for 48-72 hours after their injection, before the promised relief begins. Yeah. So, it's actually worse than it was before I got the shot that's supposed to make me quit limping around in constant pain. Fun, fun, fun! Second, I am one of the roughly 15% of patients who also get "facial flushing" after receiving their shot. Now, that really doesn't sound so bad, right? You're picturing a nice blush spreading across my cheeks, leaving me glowy and dewy-loooking, perhaps? WRONG! It started this morning with bright (and I do mean bright) red spots on each cheek. And, my skin felt HOT! Then, as the morning wore on, my face got redder and redder and redder. My secretary actually looked up at me and said, "I can actually see your nose getting redder. Does it feel hot, too?" Yes, actually. Every part of my face is boiling hot. I look like a rock lobster... One of my students stopped by to see me and said, "Mrs. B! Dude! What's wrong with your face???" Then, when I met Spencer at his bus this afternoon, he said, "Mommy, you're all RED! You look funny." Thanks a lot, kid. Way to be supportive.

Needless to say, there is no way I'm going on my very first playdate with a new family looking like Rudolph-the-friggin-Red-Nosed-Reindeer and feeling like my face is about to melt right off of my head. Not. Gonna. Happen. So, I called and postponed it. The other Mom was lovely about it on the phone, so we'll try again next week. And, maybe I'll have time to lose a few pounds before our playdate... sigh. Cheers!